DIS Argentina 2007

 

Originating Nation Database: Family

Page history last edited by Paul Barker 3 yrs ago

Originating Nation Database: Family

Group members

  • Lara Heskestad
  • Jeremy Tang
  • Maria Gonzalez
  • Paul Barker

 


 

Working together using this wiki

Think of this wiki as a shared online whiteboard. Your entire group can share information using this wiki, making your research accessible to everyone. Play around with this wiki: Notice how you can add comments to a page, see what people have changed, and edit all the text.

NOTE: there is an element of this topic that has to be very general. Not all families are the same, and the countries and cultures we are discussing here are broad and complex. Look for features that keep coming up as you read about family, family structures, and so forth. There may be overlaps between this list and the religion, social structures, and food lists. That's good! Pay attention to what each group is doing and make cross posts if they will be helpful

 

Italy

Overall description of the traditional role of family in Italy

When texts talk about how family works in Italy they generally refer to . . .

 

Italian Family Database

See Italian Family for a discussion of the following:

Typical family structure and roles

Typical family structure and roles

 

Role of the father-

Many Italian men immigrated by themselves to search for work in order to gain prosperity. They would also usually stay on average one to two years and then return home to their families. These immigrants were known as ritornati. The role of the father was not easy and usually entailed much separation from family as well as struggle to find work and support his family.

Library of Congress, “Italian Immigration”, November 2006. http://memory.loc.gov/learn/features/immig/italian.html

 

Role of the mother-

 

The role of a mother was also very hard. Many times women would stay home taking care of the children while the husband worked. It was up to the mother to cook, clean, and raise the children. After around 1900 however, women began immigrating with their husbands to other countries bringing along their children as well. This allowed for the option to stay in the country they immigrated to, or return back to their homeland.

 

Italian Immigration, November 2006. http://nhs.needham.k12.ma.us/cur/kane98/kane_p3_immig/Italian/italian.htm

 

-Role, involvement, and proximity of grandparents and extended family

 

It was important to stay close as an Italian family due to importance of family values and heritage. Many say that this is how the Mafia began. Italian families were so close- knit that if someone tried to interfere they would be punished. Even in major cities, there is usually a particular section that is mostly Italian. This way, families can assist each other in finding jobs, taking care of children, and also enjoying time together and being able to speak their native language. Extended family seemed to always be around whether it was a holiday or not to help out with the children or the housework.

“Italian immigrants were as devoted to their families as they were to their faith. The Italian family had very close ties and included grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. At the head of the household was the father, and the mother was expected to be warm and affectionate while still being subordinate to the father. The children were well disciplined and respected their parents and elders with the utmost reverence. The closeness of the Italian family was reflected in the huge family gatherings on birthdays and holidays.”

Italian Immigration, November 2006. http://nhs.needham.k12.ma.us/cur/kane98/kane_p3_immig/Italian/italian.htm

 

Marriage traditions

Italian Marriage Traditions

 

 

-In the past the bride’s and groom’s families organized the wedding. Lineage was important so if the bride’s father did not accept the groom to be then there wouldn’t be a wedding. It was very typical to see matchmakers send the bride’s family messages.

 

-Diamond engagement rings are also significant. In addition, it is also a custom to hold a bridal shower for the bride to be.

 

Catholic Ceremony

 

-First of all a bride should not wear any gold on the day she is married and until she exchanges rings with the groom because it is said to bring bad luck. In Veneto, the bride wears a veil to hide herself from bad spirits and then after they get married it is torn. While the bride does this, the groom would typically carry a piece of iron in his pocket.

Also in Veneto, it is typical to have the bride and groom to walk together to the chapel and get married on a Sunday. Usually on the way, the bride is confronted with certain obstacles that would signal if she will be a good wife and mother. For example, friends might place a broom and if she picks it up then it means that she will keep her house clean, etc.

 

Civil Wedding

 

The wedding is valid as longs as the celebrant is recognized by the Italian State. Most likely the ceremony will take place at a town hall.

 

Average Family size

In Italy, a family has on average 1.82 children.

 

Divorce Rate

 

Although divorce has been legal since the early 1970’s despite the protests of the Catholic Church, the divorce rate is Italy is very low.

Italy also has a 12% of marriages ending in a divorce which equals to .27 per thousand married couples yearly.

Very traditional Italians marry young but even today it is not surprising to see a woman or man getting married in their late 20’s or early 30’s.

Many couples that get married decide to live not too far from their families so this in return causes the in-laws to intermingle, making it harder for a couple to get a divorce if they even wanted one. Now, there are family ties.

 

In Italy there are two types of legal separation: Consensual and judicial.

Consensual: Agreement between wife and husband and then it is approved by the judge.

Judicial: Hearings and discussions are involved and the judge decides who is to blame fo the divorced.

 

The judge determines what offenses each partner has made if any and then if it is a consensual separation then the judge will determined who takes custody of the children and he/she will establish the amount and type of support the other spouse will provide.

 

Procedure to obtain a Divorce:

A petition to obtain the dissolution of the marriage must be filed with the court. Now, after the divorce, the woman loses her last name of the former husband.

It is mandatory for the spouses to obtain a separation decree. Consensual separation is quicker than judicial separation. A couple must be at least 3 years separated to file for a divorce. If they don’t file for a divorce then they can’t remarry.

However, a joint divorce, has a quicker hearing.. A judges decision is finalized about one month after the decision. An estimate of cost, including attorneys, would be between 2 and 3 million lire.

Yet, a judicial divorce takes much longer and it all depends upon the many questions and issues that need to be resolved. Cost varies in other words too. .

An attorney is probably necessary for both types of divorce.

Because Italy has a strong Catholic society, many traditional people condemn a divorce. It can still be done but Italy is considered to have the least number of divorces in all Europe.

 

http://www.divorcemag.com/statistics/statsWorld.shtml

 

Gay Rights

 

Although Italy has not enacted any national gay rights legislation, there are no anti-gay laws, either. For both homosexuals and heterosexuals is fourteen the consent age is 14.

Many feel that in the northern region of Italy, people are a bit more understanding of gay couples as long as they are not too flamboyant.

“Brutta Figura”- public display

 

Attitude of many men and women in Italy

The Vatican has a strong influence on the laws that are enforced in Italy. Homosexuals are more discriminated in the South. Because of this, many southern homosexuals move to the northern section of Italy. Yet, the gay culture is growing in Italy and there are many gay associations that support youngsters and support groups for parents so that they can understand and accept each other.

 

http://www.hudsonvalleyweddings.com/guide/italian.htm

 

Same Sex Marriage:

You cannot marry someone of the same sex but in Pisa and Florence homosexuals may register as domestic partners. This, however, does not make them legally married.

 

http://www.religioustolerance.org/

 

Child caring

 

It is every child’s social right to receive child caring. There exists a child care system that provides accommodations to children from then they are born until they are three.

Family policies provide 70% of earnings for the first 12 weeks and then 30% for the rest of the six months.

 

The Italian society expects all children to attend preschool programs between the ages of 3-5. In the north as oppose to the south, there are more child care centers and the state subsidizes private centers. In the South mothers are criticized if they leave their children at a center because it is a symbol of abandonment even though the mother is working and trying to provide the family. It can be said that the south stillholds more traditional maternal views.

 

Before the 1960’s it was a mother’s responsibility to take care of her children and she did not have legal claim to them if her husband died. However, in the mid 1960’s with a powerful women movement, maternity and infant legislations among others were implemented in Italy.

 

Now, modern mothers do work but they are still stigmatized and called “bad mothers” by the more conservative moms if they leave their children in such day care centers.

 

 

http://www.knowital.com

 

Inheritance

Today, there are strict inheritance laws for when a parent passes away. However, before these laws were established, it was simpler to divide the inheritance. If there was no will, the inheritance would usually go to the first born child or the first born son. Inheritance is an important and influential aspect if Italian culture because the younger generations can get an understanding of what life was like for their parents or grandparents. Certain objects may hold sentimental value and get passed down from generation to generation.

 

“Upon the demise of anyone holding title to assets in Italy, irrespective of nationality and living anywhere in the world, the Italian Civil Code speaks to the subject of succession law (commonly called "inheritance") and the subsequent rights of heirs. Italian law imposes what may be called "forced heirship", a term implying that specific relatives, including those not holding Italian citizenship, are entitled to a fixed proportion of a decedent's estate. In some cases, even illegitimate children are considered heirs.”

 

Italian Legal Language Services, “Italian Inheritance Basics”, November 2006. http://www.italianlaw.net/services/inheritance-filings/

 

 

 

 

 

 

British Isles

Overall description of the role of family in Great Britain

Note that Great Britain is made up of several parts: England, Ireland, Wales and Scotland, and religious traditions vary by area. Look for generalities or focus on England.

When texts talk about how family works in Britain they generally refer to . . .

 

British Family Database

See British Family for a discussion of the following:

Typical family structure and roles

-Role of the father

-Role of the mother

-Role of grandparents and extended family

-Proximity of married couples to their parents

-Involvement of extended family in day-to-day life

-Involvement of extended family in special occasions

Marriage traditions

-Importance of marriage in this culture

-Role of parents and family in selecting spouses/matchmaking

-Percentage of the overall population that is married and typical age at marriage

-Religious marriage ceremonies (traditions, practices, etc)

-Civil marriage and how it works

-Incidence of divorce and methods for divorce

-Attitudes to and legal protection of civil unions/long-term unmarried couples

-Attitudes to and laws regarding same sex marriage/civil union

Childraising

-Extent of primary care of children in the home (and who is responsible for it)

-Social support for childraising (day care, government funding)

-Attitude toward children and expectations about what constitutes "good" behavior

-Discipline of children

- Age that "children" become "adults" with adult expectations (right to marry, vote, drive, join the military)

Inheritance

-Who inherits land and money at the death of a parent?

-Extent that have inheritance laws and practices have influenced the culture

 

Eastern European Jews

Overall description of Eastern European Jewish family roles

NOTE: The majority of Eastern European Jews who immigrated to Argentina were Ashkenazi, [you should focus on Ashkenazi or just be general . . . your decision . . .]

When texts talk about how family works in Jewish culture they generally refer to . . .

 

Jewish Family Database

See Jewish Family for a discussion of the following:

 

Typical family structure and roles

 

Parents Roles

Parents may not sacrifice their children, neither to a foreign deity (Leviticus 20:1) nor to God. Incest is strictly forbidden (Leviticus 18:6-7). Parents are responsible for educating their children (Deuteronomy 11:19). First-born sons must be redeemed from the priesthood (Exodus 13:2,13). Insults to parents are subject to grave punishment (Leviticus 20:9). Fathers must circumcise sons on their eighth day of life (Genesis 17:10-14). http://www.myjewishlearning.com/daily_life/relationships/TO_Parent_Child.htm

Traditionally and historically, men were the ones in the workplace.

As for education, the duty of formal education, in Torah, in a trade, and in basic survival skills (including swimming), falls to the father. However, childrearing and cultural education (the kind you don't get in school), is historically the woman's. www.scjfaq.org/faq/08-38.html

It is the job of the woman to guide herself, her mate and her family, to teach them selfless love and bring them closer to G-d. www.scjfaq.org/faq/08-01.html

 

Role of grandparents

Grandparents have a unique relationship with grandchildren because in most situations they do not deal with day-to-day responsibilities. Grandparents can be selective in what the focus of their time spent together will be. Grandchildren are often particularly receptive to these occasions since they are special and out of the ordinary. It is thus possible to share one's knowledge and experiences and to relate personal views which can strengthen a child's understanding of Jewish traditions.

http://www.myjewishlearning.com/daily_life/relationships/TO_Parent_Child/Grandparenting.htm

 

Marriage traditions

Importance of marriage in this culture

Marriage is vitally important in Judaism. Refraining from marriage is not considered holy, as it is in some other religions. On the contrary, it is considered unnatural. The Talmud says that an unmarried man is constantly thinking of sin.

Marriage is not solely, or even primarily, for the purpose of procreation. Traditional sources recognize that companionship, love and intimacy are the primary purposes of marriage, noting that woman was created in Gen. 2:18 because "it is not good for man to be alone," rather than because she was necessary for procreation. http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm

Lifelong marriage between one man and one woman is the ideal articulated by the Garden of Eden story. Jewish tradition uses the term kiddushin, literally holiness, to describe such a marriage. It is marriage, the commitment of a man and a woman to a lifelong exclusive sexual relationship that helps us rise above the animal kingdom. http://www.heartfelt.com/Communications.html

 

Acquiring a Spouse

Mishnah Kiddushin 1:1 specifies that a woman is acquired (i.e., to be a wife) in three ways: through money, a contract, and sexual intercourse. Ordinarily, all three of these conditions are satisfied, although only one is necessary to effect a binding marriage.

Acquisition by money is normally satisfied by the wedding ring. It is important to note that although money is one way of "acquiring" a wife, the woman is not being bought and sold like a piece of property or a slave. This is obvious from the fact that the amount of money involved is nominal (according to the Mishnah, a perutah, a copper coin of the lowest denomination, was sufficient). In addition, if the woman were being purchased like a piece of property, it would be possible for the husband to resell her, and clearly it is not. Rather, the wife's acceptance of the money is a symbolic way of demonstrating her acceptance of the husband, just like acceptance of the contract or the sexual intercourse.

To satisfy the requirements of acquisition by money, the ring must belong to the groom. It cannot be borrowed, although it can be a gift from a relative. It must be given to the wife irrevocably. In addition, the ring's value must be known to the wife, so that there can be no claim that the husband deceived her into marrying by misleading her as to its value.

In all cases, the Talmud specifies that a woman can be acquired only with her consent, and not without it. Kiddushin 2a-b.

As part of the wedding ceremony, the husband gives the wife a ketubah. The word "Ketubah" comes from the root Kaf-Tav-Bet, meaning "writing." The ketubah is also called the marriage contract. The ketubah spells out the husband's obligations to the wife during marriage, conditions of inheritance upon his death, and obligations regarding the support of children of the marriage. It also provides for the wife's support in the event of divorce. There are standard conditions; however, additional conditions can be included by mutual agreement. Marriage agreements of this sort were commonplace in the ancient Semitic world.

The ketubah has much in common with prenuptial agreements, which are gaining popularity in the United States. In the U.S., such agreements were historically disfavored, because it was believed that planning for divorce would encourage divorce, and that people who considered the possibility of divorce shouldn't be marrying. Although one rabbi in the Talmud expresses a similar opinion, the majority maintained that a ketubah discouraged divorce, by serving as a constant reminder of the husband's substantial financial obligations if he divorced his wife.

The ketubah is often a beautiful work of calligraphy, framed and displayed in the home.

http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm

 

A Typical Wedding Ceremony

It is customary for the bride and groom not to see each other for a week preceding the wedding. On the Shabbat of that week, it is customary among Ashkenazic Jews for the groom to have an aliyah (the honor of reciting a blessing over the Torah reading). This aliyah is known as an ufruf. There are exuberant celebrations in the synagogue at this time. Throwing candy at the bride and groom to symbolize the sweeteness of the event is common (Soft candy, of course! Usually Sunkist Fruit Gems, which are kosher).

Traditionally, the day before the wedding, both the bride and the groom fast.

Before the ceremony, the bride is veiled, in remembrance of the fact that Rebecca veiled her face when she was first brought to Isaac to be his wife.

The ceremony itself lasts 20-30 minutes, and consists of the kiddushin and the nisuin. For the kiddushin, the bride approaches and circles the groom. Two blessings are recited over wine: one the standard blessing over wine and the other regarding the commandments related to marriage. The man then places the ring on woman's finger and says "Be sanctified (mekudeshet) to me with this ring in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel."

After the kiddushin is complete, the ketubah is read aloud.

The nisuin then proceeds. The bride and groom stand beneath the chuppah, a canopy held up by four poles, symbolic of their dwelling together and of the husband's bringing the wife into his home. The importance of the chuppah is so great that the wedding ceremony is sometimes referred to as the chuppah. The bride and groom recite seven blessings (sheva brakhos) in the presence of a minyan (prayer quorum of 10 adult Jewish men). The essence of each of the seven blessings is:

1. ... who has created everything for his glory

2. ... who fashioned the Man

3. ... who fashioned the Man in His image ...

4. ... who gladdens Zion through her children

5. ... who gladdens groom and bride

6. ... who created joy and gladness ... who gladdens the groom with the bride

7. and the standard prayer over wine.

The couple then drinks the wine.

The groom smashes a glass (or a small symbolic piece of glass) with his right foot, to symbolize the destruction of the Temple.

The couple then retires briefly to a completely private room, symbolic of the groom bringing the wife into his home.

This is followed by a festive meal, which is followed by a repetition of the sheva brakhos. Exuberant music and dancing traditionally accompany the ceremony and the reception.

You will rarely hear the traditional "Here Comes the Bride" wedding march at a Jewish wedding. This song, more accurately known as the Bridal Chorus from Lohengrin, was written by antisemitic composer Richard Wagner. He was Hitler's favorite composer, and it is said that the Nazis used to broadcast Wagner's songs over the concentration camps. For this reason, Jews have been understandably resistant to play his music at our weddings. Awareness of this historical tidbit is fading, though, as is that resistance.

 

Divorce

The book of Deuteronomy, recognizing the reality of human weakness, does permit divorce. (see Deuteronomy 24:1-4) But it is considered a sad, last resort, far from the ideal. Heartfelt

Judaism generally maintains that it is better for a couple to divorce than to remain together in a state of constant bitterness and strife.

Under Jewish law, a man can divorce a woman for any reason or no reason. The Talmud specifically says that a man can divorce a woman because she spoiled his dinner or simply because he finds another woman more attractive, and the woman's consent to the divorce is not required. In fact, Jewish law requires divorce in some circumstances: when the wife commits a sexual transgression, a man must divorce her, even if he is inclined to forgive her.

This does not mean that Judaism takes divorce lightly. Many aspects of Jewish law discourage divorce. The procedural details involved in arranging a divorce are complex and exacting. Except in certain cases of misconduct by the wife, a man who divorces his wife is required to pay her substantial sums of money, as specified in the ketubah (marriage contract). In addition, Jewish law prohibits a man from remarrying his ex-wife after she has married another man. Kohanim cannot marry divorcees at all.

 

The Process of Obtaining a Divorce

According to the Torah, divorce is accomplished simply by writing a bill of divorce, handing it to the wife, and sending her away. To prevent husbands from divorcing their wives recklessly or without proper consideration, the rabbis created complex rules regarding the process of writing the document, delivery, and acceptance. A competent rabbinical authority should be consulted for any divorce.

The document in question is referred to in the Talmud as a sefer k'ritut (scroll of cutting off), but it is more commonly known today as a get. The get is not phrased in negative terms. The traditional text does not emphasize the breakdown of the relationship, nor does it specify the reason for the divorce; rather, it states that the woman is now free to marry another man.

It is not necessary for a husband to personally hand the get to the wife. If it is not possible or desirable for the couple to meet, a messenger may be appointed to deliver the get.

It is important to note that a civil divorce is not sufficient to dissolve a Jewish marriage. As far as Jewish law is concerned, a couple remains married until the woman receives the get. This has been a significant problem: many liberal Jews have a religiously valid marriage, yet do not obtain a religiously valid divorce. If the woman remarries after such a procedure, her second marriage is considered an adulterous one, and her children are considered mamzerim (bastards, illegitimate).

 

Same Sex Marriage

The Reconstructionist movement of Judaism “support for the full inclusion of gay men and lesbians in all aspects of Jewish life” and the Reform movement has called for civil same-sex marriage for many years. The Conservative movement has some opposing views over this issue. “The standing ruling of its Committee of Jewish Law and Standards, which determines the official positions of Conservative Judaism, is that Jewish law prohibits homosexuality, and therefore Jewish same-sex marriage is not appropriate.” However, many Conservative leaders disagree with the interpretation of Jewish Law and support civil and Jewish same-sex marriage and civil rights for gay men and lesbians. The Union of Orthodox Jewish Congregations of America (O.U.) has publicly rejected civil and Jewish same-sex marriage.

http://www.myjewishlearning.com/ideas_belief/sex_sexuality/Overview_Homosexuality/Sex_SameSex_Powers.htm

 

Childraising

Naming

Among Ashkenazim--that is, Jews of Central and Eastern European origin--the custom is to name the child after someone, usually a family member, who has recently died. In most cases this is a grandparent or great-grandparent. The usual explanation for this practice is that the parents hope that in receiving the name of an admired family member, the child will emulate in his or her life the virtues of the deceased namesake. To a certain extent, too, it is believed that the soul of the loved one lives on in the child who now bears his or her name. Indeed, learning about the persons for whom they are named is an excellent way for children to identify with the history of their own Jewish families and, by extension, with the history of the whole Jewish people. Some parents even add these personal explanations to the birth ceremonies for their children. http://www.myjewishlearning.com/lifecycle/Ceremonies_For_Newborns/Overview_About_Baby_Ceremonies/Choosing_a_Name.htm

 

Bar/Bat Mitzvah

For the rabbis, the significance of this life-changing moment lay in the child's new stage of physical, intellectual, and moral development. They saw 12 and 13 as the ages at which girls and boys, respectively, were no longer entirely subject to impulse, but were beginning to develop a conscience. The term bar/bat mitzvah--which means "obligated to perform the Jewish mitzvot (commandments)"--reflects the child's newfound capabilities and responsibilities.

Although the ceremony that communally affirms the child's coming of age is medieval in origin, there is evidence in rabbinic literature that the father may have recited a blessing when the child reached the age of majority. This blessing, called baruch she'p'tarani, thanks God for freeing the father from responsibility for the child's behavior, signaling a transition of control and hence responsibility from parent to child. http://www.myjewishlearning.com/lifecycle/Bar_Bat_Mitzvah/AboutBarBatMitzvah.htm

Under Jewish Law, children are not obligated to observe the commandments, although they are encouraged to do so as much as possible to learn the obligations they will have as adults. At the age of 13 (12 for girls), children become obligated to observe the commandments. The bar mitzvah ceremony formally marks the assumption of that obligation, along with the corresponding right to take part in leading religious services, to count in a minyan (the minimum number of people needed to perform certain parts of religious services), to form binding contracts, to testify before religious courts and to marry.

A Jewish boy automatically becomes a bar mitzvah upon reaching the age of 13 years, and a girl upon reaching the age of 12 years. No ceremony is needed to confer these rights and obligations. The popular bar mitzvah ceremony is not required, and does not fulfill any commandment. http://www.jewfaq.org/barmitz.htm

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